My legs trembled, my heart rate was jacked, and my eyes avoided her innocent glance. I couldn’t stand it.
I was sitting in front of my first crush.
Four years later, I’m fully making out with a girl I just met a few hours ago and I’m about to arrive at the third base.
There are certain things that you simply don’t learn at school, like, for example, talking to girls. And my case was the worst case scenario, because I attended a right wing catholic school for males only. So, as you can guess, I had no female contacts whatsoever, other than my annoying older sister and my mom.
What happened?
Day Game happened.
Day Game is a social game that’s about flirting with total female strangers on the streets. It’s very popular in Europe and in Northamerica. There are even competitions where guys score points depending on the amount of women they have spoke to and on the number they have took to bed.
Curiously the guys I’ve met that play it regularly are the exact opposite of macho greaseballs that are common in conservative societies.
Even though, isn’t Day Game disrespectful to women?
No, I don’t think so. Why would it be? Day Game is not about bragging about the girls you had sex with last week. Day Game is about understanding the inner gears of spiritual and sexual relationships between men and women.
Even in the 21st Century many taboos are still rooted in the conscience of western citizens. Specially in America (continent). Day Game is also about debunking them.
There are certain myths that time and experience proved me to be wrong like for example that girls don’t think too much about sex.
On the contrary, I learned that girls do think constantly about it. Even if they don’t admit it.
Girls should know that desiring sex doesn’t make them sluts.
So, after this revelation. Do you still want to, dear reader, learn, how to speak to girls?
Good.
I’m not an expert, but I’ll write down my experiences and what I’ve learned from real pros.
First of all, love yourself. If you are not on good terms with your own image and personality, almost no girl is gonna find you attractive. How do you love yourself? You’ll have to figure it out.
Second, one has to learn to deal with rejection…. a LOT of rejection. Even if one is a very good looking stud, there is always gonna be a girl that’s not gonna find you attractive. That is totally okay. Just as you don’t like all girls you happen to find, not all girls are gonna like you. The way I’ve learnt it is by flirting not with one girl, but with MANY and getting rejected multiple times.
Third, do not take yourself too seriously. Most girls like guys that can make them laugh. That doesn’t mean that you have to be a clown, but joking here and there would absolutely do it. Joke about yourself! If you can do that, you got it.
Fourth, take care of yourself. If you’re gonna go on the streets looking like a hobo, maybe you should reconsider even reading this article.
Fifth, be open about what you want. If I had a friend sitting next to the fridge and if I wanted a Coca-Cola from him, I wouldn’t ask him…
«Hi, could you please, I mean, I was thinking, but only if you want it, don’t get offended, could you maybe please, please, please, consider about giving me that bottle of coke, please with a cherry on top?»
Instead I would just ask him straight away…
«Dude, can you give me a bottle of coke?»
Same applies to girls. Be direct. If you have the feeling that this is going somewhere and that she likes you, just tell her how much you like her and be open about it. The worst response you can get is a no.
I can precisely say that the vast majority of women love guys that are confident and that take the first step. You would never read an erotic novel for girls with a paragraph like this one:
«He nervously asked her, almost stuttering, if she wanted to be kissed by him. She said, yes. He was shaking and shyly put his lips on hers»
Instead you would read something like this:
«He took her by the waist.
You know what’s gonna happen now, right? – he said smiling.
Her heart was beating.
Suddenly he raptured her and passionately kissed her.»
You see the difference?
I am not the ultimate Don Juan, that every single day gets laid, but those advices written on top, did help me a lot.
In my opinion, in order to loose that social fear towards women, shy guys should just try to approach any stunningly good looking girl, whom they would never speak to, and just tell them how good looking they are. Not to start a conversation, not to flirt with them, absolutely no compromise whatsoever. Just tell them what you think.
After you do that a dozen of times, you start to loose yourself, just as an athlete would do after a warm up. Then it’s a thousand times easier to approach ANY girl you like.
Believe me, I’ve done it. At first I was almost peeing my pants just at the idea of approaching hot girls, but after a while you get used to it. I did it, you can do it.
Many guys don’t know when to kiss a girl or how to know if a girl likes you. The only way you learn that is by constantly flirting on girls and by reading about body language. Most girls will never tell you «now kiss me» (although one of my first dates told me that because I was too shy and clumsy back then to even kiss her) or «let’s have sex», unless you two already have kissed and had sex before. Body language and mood, communicate paramount desires… not spoken language (in most cases).
Many guys also don’t know when a girl means NO. If she turns her head when you’re about to kiss her that’s a NO, if you touch her and she gets away from you that’s a NO, and if you constantly ask her out and she doesn’t have time, then that’s a NO.
All that knowledge may seem obvious for some readers, but I’ve noticed that many young fellas that recently come out of school ignore such facts completely. And I’m not excluded, when I was 18, I had no idea about it. Absolutely no idea.
Boys and girls should be taught about the invisible etiquette and about the invisible ways people say yes, I like you or no, I don’t like you, but let’s be just good friends.
If such matters were addressed on a normal basis, it would save us all a lot of problems.
Understanding between men and women is vital for society. Women should not be called sluts, just because they are open about wanting sex. In a better world, men and women would be honest and respectful about it. We need to start building bridges.
